The Question was:
Q. What would you call people who provoke you to get a reaction?
(I mean; besides having an obvious personality disorder.)
Though I have been blessed in my life with so many good people and friends...
I have also like many people have been a victim of demeaning, phony people and antagonizers in my life- so I’m very in tune with it, even I get tired of it and I’m very patient and so so many chances are given.
(I’m a straight up person- I pretend at nothing so if I don’t like someone, I don’t play them but I treat them accordingly- as they treat me!)
It’s absolutely annoying to give someone so many new starts for them to continue on with their inflictions and disorder - the best way to deal with this twisted type is to lessen your time with them!!!
find a friend who won’t make you utterly miserable by being so unpredictable and unreliable,
Don’t ever say it’s better than no friend and nobody has no friend... because one useless and antagonizing friend is really not a friend and it’s not your job to fix stupid, your job is only to forgive but not to be abused. 😊😂
Found on Quora:
I think this answer was the best though most comes naturally as we defend ourselves naturally:
Yes there is a name for such behaviour. Someone with borderline, antisocial or narcissistic PD in the DSM (Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders).
A difficult person in your life might not have a full-blown personality disorder; they may just have related traits that express themselves from time to time. It still takes a toll on your well-being and self-esteem to be around them.
Here's a short list of the types of people I would lump into the "unreasonable":
• Those you can't have a reasonable conversation with; they somehow twist your words or totally confuse you and then tell you that you're the one who doesn't know how to communicate
• People who make subtly or overtly demeaning comments or say cutting things to you disguised as a "joke"
• Those that don't respect boundaries and seem to enjoy stepping all over one after you've placed it
• The types that aren't willing to consider your point of view or listen to your side of things (or just stare at you blankly, or laugh, or explode, when you try to explain "how you feel")
• Bullies
• Verbal or emotional abusers (these can also range from subtle to overt)
• Manipulators
• Liars
• People who leave you feeling bad, sad, shaky or feeling sick in the pit of your stomach
• "Crazymakers," a.k.a. people who provoke you into acting crazy or unbalanced (and love making you feel like there's something wrong with you when you do), when your behaviour across the rest of your life is proof that you're not
• The excessively charming who are too good to be true and have an ulterior motive
You know who I mean.
Now, here are the things I've learned about how to handle them and minimize the damage to yourself, your days, your sanity and your life:
1) Minimize time with them
Keep your interactions as short as possible. Minimizing your exposure to pathology goes a long, long way.
2) Keep it logical
You know, those "when you do X it makes me feel Y" communication tactics we're taught in relationship books. This type of heart-centered communication only works with reasonable people who care. Unreasonable people usually don't care, and their response (or lack of it) will often only make you more upset. Keep communications fact-based, using minimal details.
3) Don't drink around them
Though it's tempting to knock back a glass of wine or two when you're around people like this, it will only make you more emotionally vulnerable and more likely to do or say something useless that will either make you look bad, make you feel bad, or make you more of a target.
4) Focus on them in conversation
A way to avoid being the target of demeaning comments, manipulation or having your words twisted is to say as little as possible. Volunteer minimal information and get them talking about themselves (if you have to be around them or talk to them, that is)—they are a far safer conversation subject than you are.
